Yesterday I was there, today I am here… I closed the door to an era with only one day. I have no clue where this is taking me, or if it takes me anywhere at all… I don’t really like it here, I never did actually. It’s not the place or the people… I didn’t like the other place either, but that was because of the place and the people. I don’t like it here for I know it’s not my place. It will take me a little while until I will find my next destination, cause here I will definitely won’t catch many flies. That’s it for now. I have to go back to sleep, cause, like I predicted I just arrived and I got very sick (bronchitis) and I am forced to spend most of my time in bed being very sleepy all the time.

It’s going to be a long long Christmas…

I miss being alone already.

What is time? Where does it coming from? What does it do? When does it stop? What is its purpose?
Time is the essence of us all, it measure our life in seconds, moments, minutes, hours, years… It comes out of someones need to measure his boredom or his actions. It makes us wait, calculate, think, speed, run, wake up, sleep, it makes us robots. It never stops unfortunately, except for those lucky enough to reach the intensity of time, when a moment seems like an eternity filled with passion and pleasure. Its purpose is to calculate our life and stamp our memories with time lines.
I wonder how is it for someone that has amnesia… How time reflect his/her memories? Does it feel better to not know your past, to not remember your mistakes and errors, to not remember any feeling at all? It’s tricky I know, but I somehow believe that amnesia can be a wonderful experience for some of us. It gives you the chance of taking it from the start all over again…
Another wonder that I have about time is: why every time I have a lot of time to spare and nothing to do, I never tend to do the things I love, like paint, write, draw, re-decorate, walk in the park, listen my favourite music… I always try to find something else to do, I get extremely bored and I always look for new things to try, and when I get extremely busy all I want is to relax doing the things I love… I am a paradox of time.
Free or busy I always want the exact opposite of what I should in fact do with my time.
My perfect dream of spending my time (well I got two actually) starts on the land of an English castle riding a black horse towards the woods near a beautiful lake. I find it to be quite relaxing and peaceful.
The second one is on the beach, on a swing in front of a beautiful house with blue curtains, watching the ocean and taking the breeze in my lungs… hm… the smell of the salty water makes me feel so… good, calm, relaxed, reborn…
In my fantasy I should have 2 houses, one on the beach of a blue ocean, one on the hills, in a dark age English castle. And I would spend my holidays in islands and mountains exploring every inch of this earth…
This is what I would love to do with my time in my dreams… But then reality bites back and I only go to my fantasy world whenever I have the time… Like now… Come join me for an ice tea from Long Island on the beach tonight…
I’ll be wearing moonlight in my hair this time.

Good old dreams…